A few days ago I had a dream about my departed husband with whom I committed my life to. The vows included until 'death do us part', but death has not diminished my love for him. I came away from that dream with the idea I had to let him go. All of the way. Leave him alone, don't talk to him, don't think of him. So I have been trying to do that. He needs to be free of me.
I couldn't be more wrong about this. Why, you ask? I just stopped crying a boat load of tears after the only song that played on the trip between my house and my daughter's (we live close together) was the song I played over and over when my husband was in the hospital for long periods of time.
When he had his heart transplant in Boston we were separated for a couple of months. I went to work and took care of things like always, but my heart was with him. I was there for a couple weeks for and after the transplant, but I had to go home before they could release him.
So to replace him I 1. slept with (and would not wash) his pillow and 2. listened to Ricky Nelson's, 'You Are The Only One'.
Today that was the song that played on the oldies channel. The first time I have heard it since DH was with me.
I want to say Happy Anniversary to the only man I have ever loved. The man who took care of us the best he could. The man who always wished he could do better for us. As far as I'm concerned he gave his family his all. I was always satisfied with what he provided for us.
I love Robert Charles with all my heart and I just can't help it.
|This is the man I gave my heart to. He's with our son when he was little fixin' his 'vehicle|
This is a family favorite.