Monday, March 7, 2016

What No Pictures Again? No Just Family Wisdom

I posted a request on Facebook asking if any topic of interest should be covered.  I received two requests.  One about the importance of family and the second about menu planning.  The menu planning will have to be set aside until I learn more about it.  It so happens I'm on that journey as we 'speak', but I would feel more comfortable waiting until I have tried out different approaches.

Today I'll try to approach the subject of family.  There's a saying in the USA that a person can choose their friends, but not their family.  Although this may be true to some extent, I will argue that we can appreciate our families even more than friends.

The answer may lie in how far we will go to accept each individual family member for who and what they are.  Acceptance leads to contentment which leads to love.  As an example:

We have four children.  I love them each with all my heart.  I now have a number of grandchildren and four in laws.  That's eighteen different personalities to enhance my life.  Yes, enhance.  I can learn from each of them by opening my heart to their specific personalities.  Not try to change them to meet my needs or wants.  One of my son in laws is a business owner.  He is so much like me that it can get scary at times.  He takes good care of his family (as do all of my son in laws) and worships the ground they walk on.  If I looked at the differences between us and had an expectation that he fall into line with me all of the time, friction would be created.  The friction would spill over into their marriage.  This is not what I want for my children or grandchildren.

I have another son in law who is a police officer.  He sees some pretty rough things in his job.  But, he loves helping others  yet doesn't bring his work home with him - even though he works many, many hours.   Above all I appreciate the love he has for his family.  He demonstrates his love in the way he knows how.

My third son in law told me before he married my daughter that he can promise he will always have a roof over his family's head, food on the table, and clothes on their backs.  I began to fall for him when he told me that.  He's the one who will put an arm around me when I cry and say nothing, just offer comfort.  So he provides so much more than he thought he could.  His family receives the benefit of his kind and loving spirit.  As do all of our girls and their families.

What if - just what if- I didn't accept any of them because I looked for their faults and complained about them all of the time?  Any contentment would disappear not only between them and me, but it would spill over into their marriages and home life.  That is NOT what people who love each other do. 

What people who love each other do is see the other person's gifts and run with them.  Everyone has faults.  To only see those would have a person turn bitter and angry.  As an old friend once told me, 'When we point one finger at someone, there are four pointing back at us'.

This post is a plea to make the world a better place.  Love one another without fault.  Just give love to those around you.   If enough of us do that, perhaps the world be become the better place we yearn for.

Stay safe.


  1. Thank you Angie, I needed to hear that family talk.
    Jo Ann

  2. I'm glad to have helped. Thank you for your comment.

  3. In good times and in bad times, for joys and concerns, -- the importance of family ties cannot be overvalued. Therefore we should always try to maintain and strengthen them.
    That will help us to understand or at least forgive human errors. (Ours too, of course)
    It is absolutely worthwhile to give careful attention to our family. I should better say
    families, as I mean all members of the families of our grown up children.
    It is true that each human being is an individual being, but coming together on sunny days
    and helping each other when one is in need is a vital necessity.
    If it works, this is a reason to be very thankful.

  4. Exactly how I feel. No one is perfect but if you love them, you love all of them.

    1. CH, is that you? You're right on with this comment! Thanks for joining in on the discussion.

  5. I thought I must have missed one of your posts and here it is ! Family are everything , you are blessed as indeed is your family X